I don’t know how to feel about stuff.
My friend and I were just randomly talking about sex and condoms for god-knows-what reason and he mentioned that he doesn’t like using condoms because “going bare just feels better.” Never mind the fact that he’s fucking retarded, I mean, no need to go into details about how condoms can save your dick from falling off (not literally but you know what I mean) but the whole...
Day-dreams have a way of setting us up for future...
Our brains should already know better.
Who wants to help me wash my car?
We can get wet n’stuff.
Se me acabó la fuerza de mi mano izquierda.
That awkward moment when you realize you have no one.
I wish everything was made out of potato salad.
genuinelycornflakes: I’m gonna write Joe Biden/Barack Obama fanfiction and it’s going to be called forBiden love
Now that I work part time at a Seven11 I have...
In other words, my life is made.
My new co-worker is a fucking Republican, which is unfortunate to say the least. He is against marriage equality “…just because”, and a woman’s right to choose because “you wouldn’t like to have been aborted, would you?” Also, at the mention of me not wanting to have kids for the time being, or possibly ever, “dude are you gay or something?”...
Keller! Come back to me bb! :c
My stomach always feels like shit after drinking...
tamburina: “So congratulations, North Carolina. Last night, you struck a decisive blow for loneliness. And tonight, as you go to sleep beside your heterosexual life mate, you can rest assured that all across your great state, a gay man or lesbian woman is crying themselves to sleep in solitude and making your relationship stronger with each tear.” — STEPHEN COLBERT, The Colbert Report
WHEN ONE OF US NEEDS TO BE DD
wheninla: It’s always me. :C
A friend just invited me to Vegas for the weekend and I can’t go! I want to jump off the nearest bridge pretty much.
I remember when I was a professional NBA player.
I find that I experience the most vivid dreams when I nap, as opposed to when I sleep throughout the night. I wonder why this is.
Possible Election Fraud Occuring in North Carolina →
stfuconservatives: thedisgruntledgradstudent: nerdysouth: bowiecadmium: Apparently some voters in heavily anti-Amendment 1 areas are being handed ballots that do not include Amendment 1 on the ballot. I would love to see someone try to give my mom a ballot without Amendment 1 on it. Poll workers have no idea what they’re in for. Signal boost! If there are any NC people looking at...
Adieu, Sarkozy. →
My body is stupid.
It gets hungry right after I have breakfast. That is, I just had breakfast, ten minutes ago and now I’m starving -stomach growling and all- for some fucking reason.
Before I'm executed, in death row,
I will ask for a giant bowl of potato salad for my last meal. It will be glorious.
I wish I lived in California.
Tengo ganas de ir a mear, pero tambien tengo hueva.
tamburina: Anderson Cooper: A lot of people, as... →
tamburina: Anderson Cooper: A lot of people, as you know, say, “Look, you’re playing God.” Dr. Jack Kevorkian: Isn’t the doctor who takes a leg off playing God? Anderson Cooper: You’re saying doctors play God all the time? Dr. Jack Kevorkian: Of course! Any time you interfere with a natural process,…